Saturday, March 25, 2006

Q said…

Do dogs bark in other languages?

posted by hughevans at 6:02 AM

2 Comments:

Blogger hughevans said...

Welcome, Q. I see no expense is spared when you ask your local engraver to etch out your name. Regardless, it is good to have you on board.

And, may I say, quite a ponderer you have put forward…

Well the stereoptypical ‘Woof Woof’ that we in the West are familiar with certainly changes. To my knowledge, the Korean dog will say “Mong Mong”, the Spanish “Wow Wow”, the Chinese “Wong Wong”.

But is this because of colloquial interpretation by humans, or an evolved circle of language differences much the way it happened to Man?

So, I set about a study into the origins of barking, to see if I may uncover how it may have altered over history. I needed to find a collaborater. I had heard on the grapevine of a canine by the name of ‘Bear’, “a herding dog with a history of chronic barking.”

I wasn’t sure about the chronic part but with a limited amount of time on my hands (no seriously), he would have to do.

Bear told me the following fascinating facts:

• The first ever dog was called ‘Chicken’, closely followed by its future mate, ‘Egg’ (history blurs the order of these and it is undecided whch actually came first)
• Chicken and Egg evolved from a pair of French cats (for all cats are French) called ‘Gridd le Bone’ and ‘Spoofie’. Because all cats are French, they naturally all speak French.
• So Chicken and Egg also learnt French.
• Chicken and Egg had children called Omelette and Orange who in turn had children called Ham and Peel, who then went on to have kids called Spam and Steel.
• Spam and Steel moved to England and started a family of their own. They learnt English but because of their heavy French accents their language was really more of a grunt, most words coming out in a sort of scoffing manner as “Arf Arf”. Their children (Pam and Phil) were almost undecipherable, all words coming out as “Woof Woof”.
• Sadly, dog flu hit much of Europe and most of the family were killed off. Pam and Phil were the only survivors. With nowhere really to go, the language sort of levelled off and apart from the odd genetic mutation (such as Bear who was really spoke quite eloquently) ‘Woof woof’ was about all future dogs could muster.
• Barking is the same in every language, but most dogs have the facilities to understand bi-lingually.

So there you are, straight from the dog’s mouth…

All the best Q – I hope to see you here again soon.

Hugh Evans PI

6:05 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Arf Arf!!

7:50 AM  

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